A Guilt Post

This is my guilt post. I have carb overloaded today. I had 2 slices of Margherita pizza for lunch. I'm still under the caloric and carb limits that MyFitnessPal has set for me. As a result, I don't feel great. I'm bloaty and too full. I over-indulged with a friend who is experiencing her first break up. Again... the social eating. I've done mostly well with her. I've been helping her move out of their shared apartment while we talk instead of stuffing my face when we talk.

I will be a stronger person. My body is made of cells and the cells are made of what I eat. I will make healthy, organic cells that are fully functional and made with proper nutrition. I will drink enough water (I still have 5 hours to make that happen). I will plan my meals better for tomorrow and the weekend.

I'm thinking, since I have a particular hard time with weekends, that I should make my Saturdays a raw food/vegan day. I mean... that's one entire day of not eating garbage. But I will definitely need to grocery shop and to find recipes before the weekend starts. I find that without preparation and forethought, I eat too much of sparsely nutritious food. So this weekend, I'm going to try my hand at making my own Breakfast Bars with fiber and protein for those mornings on the go and those afternoon carb cravings.

Wednesday is the only day of the 5 day week that I don't spend doing any physical activity. So in addition to the poor eating, I'm feeling really guilty and lethargic. I refuse to fall back into old habits. Tonight I will walk home from work (.5 miles) instead of catch the quick ride home with a coworker. I will push myself hard tomorrow in swimming and dance. I will pick up my walking pace and get that heart pumping.

Water: 80oz (it's only 5pm though, I can get in another 40).
Workouts: 3/6 for the week.
Veggies: 3/2 servings

Big Fat {guilty} Love,
Nanette

Today's Mantra

I love these photos. I love that I will feel thinner and healthier soon. I will love these photos for showing me my progress. I will... I will...  

The Tuesday Weigh In

Hurrah! Monday was a fluke! It was only to get me working harder! I weighed in at an even 340! Down 3lbs!

I'm taking my dear cousin Amber's advice and watching my carbs instead of my sugars and I'm feeling much less ornery about food. I'm super amazed at the amount of protein in cottage cheese and it's a favorite food of mine right now - in moderation. I'm learning that I can eat what I want... in moderation. Though I'm still not going to waste precious eating calories on things with corn syrup , cough*SODA*cough.

Peppermint extract

Soda... that's been a journey already. I've found multiple items to replace soda in my life.
- Adding herb extracts (not the cooking variety) to water: Peppermint water
- Stevia sweetened sodas: Blue Sky
- Tea: Honest Tea





The exercise is getting easier. I can walk after dance class. I'm not worn out after swimming. The Monday cardio day leaves me feeling wobbly and limber. Friday's weights still leave me sore until Monday. But I don't consider skipping the work outs. It's not even a possibility. I know that it will definitely be more difficult as the weather gets worse. I'm trying to load up on the motivation now to get me through that.

Taking off three post its when I get home. Once I lose the 340 lb... I get to reward myself with a haircut or new headphones. I don't know which yet.

Water: 100 oz
Work outs: 3/6 for the week.
Veggies: 1/2 servings.

Big Fat Love,
Nanette

Christmas Dress Countdown Challenge - Initial Post.

Sorry about the late post, guys. I don't have the interwebs on the weekend.

1 - starting weight: 343
2 - Size of Dress: 26/28
3 - Book: Skinny Bitch + cookbook + myfitnesspal.com
4 - Caloric limit: 1900
5 - 2x cardio + strength training, 2x swim class, 2x dance class.
6 - Dress is in the previous post
7 - Water: 1/2 my weight in ounces daily.

It was a tough weekend. I went out a couple of times with friends (food not booze). But I'm staying underneath the caloric limit. I'm just eating too much sugar and not drinking enough water. I was sad to get on the scale after this morning's work out and see that I had gained .5 lb.

However, I did get to the gym on Friday morning. I got 45 minutes of cardio on the stationary bike [interval training] and then 30 minutes of strength training - shoulders, chest. It made for a 5x work out week.

This week is already off to a better start. I got 30 minutes on the bike in and a 20 minute walk to and from the gym. I've been eating healthier today. However, according to fitnesspal I'm still over on sugar mainly because of my fruit intake. But I refuse to see my fruit consumption as a negative thing. I've worked hard to want to eat raw foods and I don't want to be demotivated by that.

On the other hand, I've found that I do not take in enough iron. So here's searching... low sugar, high iron foods - not that I think there are many high sugar iron-y foods.

This week's goals:
1- Be more consistent about drinking lots of water (pee it off!!!)
2- First week of 6x work outs!
3- Eat more leafy greens and veggies in general (at least 2 servings a day).

AAAANNND.... a link. Check it out, The CDCC.

Another Few Bite The Dust!

Weigh in: 342.5 (-3.5 lbs!)

It's surprising and I'm not sure I can believe the scale at this point. I've been using the myfitnesspal to track my exercise and food consumption. I like the feature it has. When you finish entering your food and exercise today you can click on "complete this entry" and see what kind of weight you'd lose in 5 weeks with the same kind of food and activity. It's kinda cool and keeps me thinking about "well what would fitness pal say?"

I borrowed an idea from Jillian's blog. I put up post its on my "Narnia" door (It leads into the used book store connected to my studio). Each post it represents a pound. I hid prizes underneath each 20lb mark (permission to myself to buy a new art supply, or haircut, or facial). Today I was so excited to remove three.

It looks like the hard times are going to happen on the weekends. Those damned unstructured weekends. I'm trying to prevent the social eating by having a menu and taking time to cook the things I really love like eggs and whole wheat toast or balsamic chicken. I'm also looking at some of my refrigerated veggies on the verge of dying... so out of want to not waste, there will be salad. What was I thinking buying a Costco bag of romaine? Saturday is the Farmer's Market. What a perfect time to be social around food! I can go with someone and encourage them to get produce too! :)

Tomorrow is day 4 of 7 of not eating out, but cooking/packaging things I want to eat at home and bringing them with me to work and school. I'm so happy to see that my bank balance has hardly moved at all this week. It's helping me afford those special treats under the 20 lb post its.

Sunday is the beginning of the Christmas Dress Countdown Challenge (CDCC). I'm hoping SO hoping to be able to wear a size 24 or smaller by then. I haven't been able to notice a change in my clothing yet, even since my heaviest (368). I'm not sure if I'm losing it in areas that aren't as noticeable. And when things like, my pants slipping down happen, I readily excuse it as the denim having stretched since it's the second time I've worn them since washing. I look forward to it being undeniable that I'm wearing a different size, but I guess it will take more than 25.5 lbs to start seeing that.

Part of me wants to see my parents (who haven't seen me since June) and see if they notice. Particularly since they're very prone to mentioning my weight... maybe they'd be the ones with the keen eye.

This Weekend's Goals
- Don't eat out. Not even ONCE.
- Keep Hydrated (100 oz at least a day).
- Get one work out done in the gym.
- Take one late night fun walk.

Big Fat Love,
Nanette

PS. The two dresses I'm choosing between. The bodice on the taupe one is so beautifully beaded and draped. But I love the girlish 60's structure *(and the price) of the pink one. Frankly, I could use both for performing.

Rake's Progress...

Weighed in again this morning. Fortunate for me I did not gain or lose anything. I'm sitting happy at 346 (pre peeing).

Weekends are the hardest for me. I'm home. I don't have the structure of school. I DO have the convenience of a refrigerator and the free time for eating out with friends. This weekend was another example of bad eating. I went on a field trip with my voice pedagogy class and we all went out to dinner afterward. Snacks at a friends house. Breakfast at the diner. A BBQ. Lunch with a friend. Grilling with a different friend.

If it's not obvious already, FOOD is SOCIAL for me. I find myself standing before a fridge when I want to interact with people. I eat when I'm lonely. I eat when I'm bored. I eat whenever I wish I had a distraction because that's what socializing is to me as well. So I'm trying to break that. I'm trying to spend time with people that doesn't revolve around FOOD.

My body has recuperated from last week. I made it to swim class and dance class today. I'm hoping that when I weigh in again on Thursday I can see a smaller number. I'm also hoping that after Thursday's dance class, I'll still be able to move because I have a fitness date with my dear friend Trent Friday morning.

I've done well on the goals today...
Water: 150oz.
Food: mainly veggies, no added sugars, enriched white flour, corn syrups or caffeine.
Meals made at home: 3.5 (snacks).
Weight lost: 0 lbs.


Big Fat Love,
Nanette

Dreams Into Plans

It's the second week of the semester. First week upped my walking just by going to classes. This semester I'm taking a dance basics class (bits of tap, ballet, jazz, yoga & Pilates) and an acquacise class (not for grannies, it is HARD)... on the same day (Tuesdays and Thursdays). BIG. DUMB. MISTAKE. I've been sore for over a week now.

However, I'm down 7lbs since I started a week ago. I weigh myself pre-peeing, pre-work out. So there's no phantom loss or whatever. I'm thinking it's water weight. I need to get some before photos going so I can do a "contrast and compare" afterward. Maybe tonight. What to wear... Lord, the world isn't ready for this tubby in a sports bra. But how about a cami and some short shorts.

Today after swim class, I limped out of the gym. My quads are KILLING me. I can't bend at the knee properly right now... I feel like my leg is supposed to bend backwards. So I gave myself motivational speeches...

"Nanette, you're going to go to dance class."
"I don't want to go to ANY more classes. Maybe I can pretend like I have a dentist appointment."
"That's NOT THE POINT. Weight loss isn't easy. It sucks right now but you'll be glad later."
"Okay... But I can't freaking bend at the knees. What do I do when I get there?"
"Tell you what. Get dressed. Walk up there. If by the time you walk all the way to Redhill you still want to turn around and go home, you can."
"That sounds good. I'm probably going to turn around."
"Yeah... probably. But then you climbed the hill. That's a plus. exercise-y."

Well, as inspiring as the conversation was, I DID go to the rest of my classes. I DID change into my work out clothes for dance class. I DID fall asleep putting on my shoes. I DID show up late for the class after dance.

Punishment: Walk home from work tonight instead of getting a ride with Angela. AND, I owe myself one work out this weekend (and no dumb little 30 min on a bike work out, a full hour).

As far as food goes, today has been good.
Breakfast: Prunes (for potassium) & cantaloupe (for the sake of it over-ripening in my fridge)
Lunch: Smoked Almonds (my bacon replacement) and an odwalla bar.
Dinner: TBA

I'm stuck at the office. Here are my options: tough it out and eat when I get home at 10pm (Which will make it 12 hours since I last ate), Jimmy Johns (no mayo, no cheese), or eating a packet of oatmeal. Again, the internal struggle. Let's be objective... I have not consumed enough calories today. I've had a lot of fruit, no veggies, a little grain/seeds. Methinks a Jimmy Johns veggie sub sounds great. This makes the first time I've gone out for food this week. And tomorrow is the bodies exhibit with the voice ped class where we travel to Idaho Falls and go out for dinner afterwards. That means I'm at the limit for the week. Good thing it's Thursday.

Okay...   so If you like diet talk, there it is. :) If you don't like diet talk, try my other blog HERE or even HERE

Big Fat love,
Nanette